When I came back to my room this morning, I wasn’t wearing pants and the door was locked. I had taken a shower and my roommate locked me out.

Simple mistake. Happens all the time.

I would ride the (hopefully empty) elevator downstairs, grab a key, and open my door. I would return the key I borrowed and head to class, barely a minute late. I could get in and get out, only in my underwear in public for a minute, tops.

I knew as soon as I got on the elevator this was not going to be that simple.

There were seven girls already on, but there was room for me and I had things to learn and no time to wait more. I tried to deal with the awkwardness as best I could.

When I got to the lobby, I explained the situation to the very polite desk clerk. She understood, but unfortunately she couldn’t just let me have a key.

She asked me if I had $25.

I did. In my pants. That weren’t on me.

Well, the best she could do was have me wait until someone came along that could loan me the money.

Fortunately, I only had to wait five minutes until some kind soul took pity on my pantless personage and loaned me the money. I got the key and my pants.

My problem is that I stood in the lobby for five minutes (because I got lucky) before I could rectify a very simple mistake. This wasn’t the person at the desk’s fault. Her hands were tied. The problem lies with Housing and Residence Life creating a bureaucratic culture that completely devalues its employees’ ability to use simple reasoning skills and their experience with the community to make spot decisions.

I wasn’t calling Microsoft for my $500 rebate, I was trying to wear pants.

I understand HRL’s concern for my safety, but its name is Housing and Residence LIFE. When HRL interacts with us, it should do it in the context of living. We don’t just sleep in dorms, we live in residence halls.

Bureaucracies rarely have anything to do with real life or getting things done. They exist to avoid liability.

In life, sometimes you get locked out and you need a key to get back in.

The desk clerk saw me coming from inside the building with wet hair and, well, no pants.

I am a journalist, and many times my job calls for me to investigate people doing dumb things. I still have enough faith in humanity to think that anyone currently attending a university could make the judgment call that I wasn’t a threat and would return the key.

In life, she loans me a key and I return it. In HRL, I wait for someone to loan me $25 to basically rent a key and then promptly return the key.

I’m not the only person this has happened to, I’m sure. And I’m sure that equally absurd instances have occurred in other areas. It kind of goes hand in hand with having absurd policies. I still think we can all agree that my continued pants wearing may trump some short term security concerns, however.

The opinions expressed in this commentary do not reflect those of the Herald or the university.