There I was, standing in Garrett’s hot, musty basement Tuesday night with about 20 people beside me.

After going through two tornado warnings, we were down there for about 20 minutes. I don’t know if it was going to be serious, but I kept my cool.

Before it was over, a woman asks us, “Do you all know Jesus?”

Got me to thinking.

Whenever a possible near-death experience comes around, everyone wants to start doing things the “right way.” No more meanness, but all goodness.

So I came to the conclusion that I’m gonna be a different person, starting now. Out with the old Amb, in with the new. New and improved. Yep.

Because you know what? I’m tired of being known as Amber, the angry chick who is difficult to deal with and is too pessimistic about life.

I’m tired of being known as someone who makes touchy-feely people feel uncomfortable around me because I always tell them how annoying they were for being “too nice.”

Old Amber was awkward and someone too aggressive to speak her mind on certain things – OK, everything.

But New Amber? Haha. Watch out, America.

Now I’m gonna become Judah Friedlander from Dave Mathews Band’s “Everyday” video and hug everybody in sight.

Old Amber would’ve scoffed at anyone who would make a DMB reference in casual conversation.

Not this time. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, so I shall no longer make fun of people because of their music collections, because I realize there’s no such thing as people having “crappy taste” in music.

I was talking to my friend online, and I asked if he liked Modest Mouse’s “The Moon and Antarctica” album he bought. He said, “Eh, I heard a few songs and it didn’t do anything for me.”

I said, “Oh, sigh (because it’s my favorite band, so of course I’d defend them).” And he said that talking to me about music was like talking about politics. I never looked at it that way. I mean, maybe he was just being a sensitive pansy about it, but maybe not.

I used to think that everyone should at least like Jimi Hendrix or Modest Mouse or “The Royal Tenenbaums” to be considered worthy, but that’s not fair, man, not fair at all. But luckily, I’ve taken heed to this horrid flaw.

And I shall no longer poke jabs at the conservatives. They just want to make sure that we go the right path in life, so this liberals vs. conservatives garbage should be put to an end, and I want to be the person who starts this campaign.

The Old Amber made fun of the woman who asked us if we knew Jesus. I was always highly irritated with those people who always made it a point to tell us their religious beliefs and how everyone should be followers of said religion.

Well, hey, that’s their life, man. Let ‘em live and believe what they wanna believe, because in the end, all that matters is peace and love.

I now realize that it’s not always important to have something to say. I mean, yeah, that’s the topic of this column, but there’s more to life than always throwing your opinions out in the air.

Because, y’know, there is a thing called “too opinionated,” and I’ve been accused of that way too many times to live my life without shame.

And yes, I am ashamed.

I’ll no longer make fun, either. My favorite episode of “Friends” is when Chandler isn’t allowed to make fun of his friends for a week, and he fails miserably. Not me, though. From here on out, I’m a changed woman. No more swearing, no more anger, no more being overly-opinionated and no more jokes.

People have said to me many times, “But Amber, that’s what I love about you – you’re so honest.”

And I agree with them whole-heartedly, and I enjoy it whole-heartedly without any remorse, but c’mon, do I really want to continue to live this life of sin?

I can’t even bear the thought.

I feel so much better now. I am at peace.

Let’s loot Amber’s apartment!

Amber North is the Herald assistant sports editor and humor columnist. You can reach her at ambanorth@hotmail.com.